Pray for Confederate Yankee

Cross posted at MyDD
One of our good friends in the freeper sector of the blogosphere has been afflicted with some sort of unidentified degenerative brain disease. In the interest of transparency and full understanding, I am pulling up the last few exchanges we have had in my previous post about Confederate Yankee Bans The Facts.

I’ll pick up our informative exchange at the point where my good friend calls me an idiot:

I hate to ruin your rant (you seem to be enjoying such a nice one, but I didn’t delete your comment. It is still located in the comments for the post “Aid and Comfort.” You even responded back to my response for this post.
Perhaps you should lay off the illegal substances.
Posted by: Confederate Yankee at November 25, 2005 06:14 PM

Editor’s note: The omission of the close parens symbol was in the original comment.
Somewhat baffled by Confederate Yankee’s irrational belief that I was accusing him of deleting my comment, I went back and re-read my original comment and replied:

Confederate Fascist,
It was very considerate of you to stop by STF and demonstrate your allergy to facts. If you had the reading comprehension level of a sixth grader, you would not have deluded yourself into thinking I accused you of deleting my comment from your ideologically fascist website.
Ask one of the neighborhood children to read my comment out loud for you and you will discover that I did not complain about my comment being deleted. I simply re-posted it for the convenience of STF readers. I did not wish to subject them to the intellectual dischord of visiting your fascist, fact challenged website.
Perhaps you should take a remedial reading course at your local Community College. I recommend asking them to teach you how to understand what the words on the page say, as opposed to what you would like them to say.
Recommended reading: How To Read A Book by Mortimer Adler.
Free Tip: Read the black parts of the page.
Posted by: Gary Boatwright at November 25, 2005 08:58 PM

Apparently I was still not being clear enough for Confederate Yankee’s deranged, incapacitated, inebriated or intellectually inoperative brain to comprehend, because he responded with these irrelevant comments:

Hey Gary:
Perhaps before you try to teach others how to read, you should read The Concise English Handbook. I’m only mentioned in the credits of those who teach how to write, you stupid son of a bitch.
Posted by: Confederate Yankee at November 25, 2005 10:56 PM
Folks, I’d like to apologize for my language. The arrogantly stupid seem to irritate me very badly, and I shouldn’t pick on them.
Posted by: Confederate Yankee at November 25, 2005 10:59 PM

As you can see our friend is struggling mightily with some sort of unidentified inner demon. Whatever he may have accomplished in his glory days of youth does not change the simple fact that he completely mis-read my comment. So in the interest of harmony in the blogosphere and clarification of the issue, here is my reply:

Fascist Moron,
I regret that I have been granting you too much respect. Somehow you reached the bizarre conclusion that I was accusing you of deleting the comment I posted at your website. Let’s examine the sentence immediately preceeding the comment I reproduced here at STF:
Here is the entire comment that I posted at Confederate Fascist, without the link to the British newspaper that carried the article:
Allow me to repeat that statement with emphasis for clarity:
Here is the entire comment that I posted at Confederate Fascist, without the link to the British newspaper that carried the article:
This is apparently the way you read that same statement:
Here is the entire comment that I posted at Confederate Fascist, which Confederate Fascist deleted, without the link to the British newspaper that carried the article:
I believe that explains why I recommended that you only read the black parts of the page. I can’t explain your pathetic inability to understand plain English or why you feel the need to blame me for your intellectual and emotional shortcomings.
Perhaps you should seek intensive therapeutic counseling so you could determine if your aversion to facts is emotional, intellectual or psychological. I wish you a speedy recovery from your affliction.

I ask all faithful STF readers to join hands with me in a prayer for Confederate Yankee’s speedy recovery from his affliction. For the sake of his family, I hope he has not contracted the dreaded Mad Coulter Disease.

2 thoughts on “Pray for Confederate Yankee

  1. 🙂 🙂
    When I was an undergrad, you always had to worry that your English prof would be a bland, genteel neo-Confederate. They had far too much sympathy for the slavemaster Benito Cereno and Captain Vere in Billy Budd.

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